I love this and it resonates so much with me as a daughter, mum and grandma. I used to feel so frustrated that my mum would buy lovely birthday and Christmas presents and put so much care into their presentation, but was rarely emotionally available. It's only recently that I've come to accept that she was doing what she could. I've done my best as a mum and grandma, but have often felt lacking. I'm learning to give myself grace in knowing that I try to do my best too, even when I feel I fall short 🩷 Karen
Thank you for sharing Karen!! And yes, we need to give ourselves this grace, too. It's not easy to admit our limitations as moms. I have a part that shames my efforts of "doing my best" because anything less than perfection or the ideal for my son feels like it's not good enough. I'm learning that this grace is so necessary in this season of matrescence with a baby bc otherwise, I burn myself out. Also my son doesn't care about perfect, he just wants me to hold him and wants his milkie lol anyway Thanks for sharing <3
Oh wow! Beautifully written, this definitely has me stepping outside of my own disorganized attachment in a new way. Observing it from this perspective did something for me. I don’t have children, but I’ve always wanted to heal my attachment style before potentially bringing one into this world. This may have brought me a step closer. I never thought too deeply of attachment style outside of parents. I like that you referred to one showing up in their way as a “gift”. Thank you for sharing!
Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts!!! Having a baby is making me realize that there are new layers and crevices to old attachment wounds I thought I healed but I think children are supposed to show you this in yourself. They also give you the grace and focus to have courage and step toward what needs healing instead of bypassing it or beating yourself up. At least that's what I'm experiencing in this chapter of my journey. Thanks again for sharing!
I love this and it resonates so much with me as a daughter, mum and grandma. I used to feel so frustrated that my mum would buy lovely birthday and Christmas presents and put so much care into their presentation, but was rarely emotionally available. It's only recently that I've come to accept that she was doing what she could. I've done my best as a mum and grandma, but have often felt lacking. I'm learning to give myself grace in knowing that I try to do my best too, even when I feel I fall short 🩷 Karen
Thank you for sharing Karen!! And yes, we need to give ourselves this grace, too. It's not easy to admit our limitations as moms. I have a part that shames my efforts of "doing my best" because anything less than perfection or the ideal for my son feels like it's not good enough. I'm learning that this grace is so necessary in this season of matrescence with a baby bc otherwise, I burn myself out. Also my son doesn't care about perfect, he just wants me to hold him and wants his milkie lol anyway Thanks for sharing <3
Oh wow! Beautifully written, this definitely has me stepping outside of my own disorganized attachment in a new way. Observing it from this perspective did something for me. I don’t have children, but I’ve always wanted to heal my attachment style before potentially bringing one into this world. This may have brought me a step closer. I never thought too deeply of attachment style outside of parents. I like that you referred to one showing up in their way as a “gift”. Thank you for sharing!
Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts!!! Having a baby is making me realize that there are new layers and crevices to old attachment wounds I thought I healed but I think children are supposed to show you this in yourself. They also give you the grace and focus to have courage and step toward what needs healing instead of bypassing it or beating yourself up. At least that's what I'm experiencing in this chapter of my journey. Thanks again for sharing!